Friday, May 22, 2009

Leg space for a lilliputter

The flight was from Zurich in Switzerland to Los Angeles and the pilot fortunately knew this is in the USA.

It was with Swiss Airways in a brand new European build Airbus.
That had a range of 10.000 kilometres and could therefore reach Los Angeles from Zurich.
But just.
10.000 kilometres range and 12 hours non-stop flying time are the maximum of this plane.
So if it would go on to Hawaii we would have end up in between in the Pacific Ocean.

Let’s make clear here immediately that Swiss is a fantastic airline to fly with.
New and modern planes, on time, well organized, flying from the best airport in the world, friendly cabin staff, pilot a nice voice and excellent food frequently served.
Even ice cream.
And several times distribution of chocolate of course.
That is Swiss tradition.

Unfortunately in the Swiss plane it is not completely paradise.
This is because they have put the seats painfully close to each other.
The leg space is ideal for lilliputters only.
All the others suffer; unable to store the legs in a comfortable non-thromboses way.
Even some conflicts broke out between passengers when seats went down in the comfy position halving the space for the passenger behind.
“How am I going to survive?”, one passenger asked the fellow traveller in front.
“Put your own seat down as well”, he replied although that did not much good for the legs.

But the experienced traveller had asked for an aisle seat.
They make you smart, these airlines!
So every few hours of the 12 hours trip a walk was made up and down the aisle to have the blood circulate and feel the legs again.
But to also escape from the passenger sitting in the next chair.
A huge American who said when he dumped his massive body in the chair:
“You probably are shocked to see a 240 pound guy come sit next to you?”
In other words, it was an asshole.
He was one of the passengers who immediately after take off banged his chair in the business class position and got a row with the Swiss guy behind him.
A big man totally insensitive for others.
This he also expressed by planting himself in the chair in such a luxurious and comfy way that half his body was in his neighbours seat.
This in such an obnoxious and shameless manner that the only way was to push him out of the space that was the justifiable territory to sit in.
But the flowing flesh would always come back while he was reading a book about American football for 12 hours.

The excellent service of life was that this monstrous person was compensated by meeting a most friendly and interesting man in the pantry.
A Hollywood film producer who had been to the film festival of Cannes in France.
With him several hours were spend talking about a whole range of subjects.

Landed in Los Angeles, good job, good job, Swiss pilot, the US Immigration Officer was a woman.
More officers were on duty than have ever been seen in LA before and this made the waiting time very reasonable.
Plus that the Immigration Officer was friendly.
Of course she had to ask what the traveller was coming to do in the USA.
Who he was going to see.
For how long.
Where he lived.
What was his job.
And of course the fingerprints had to be made of all 10 fingers.
Followed by having a picture taken without the glasses on and don’t stick your tongue out or you are deported.
Her last question was: “Do you have more than $ 10.000 in cash with you?”.
What a fantastic question!
Because it reveals the traveller looks like a person who travels around with over $ 10.000 in cash in his pockets.
It made her smile when she heard the answer: “I wish I did”.

Back in the USA.
The USA in the back.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hi Mr. Szul:.. I´m glad to know you are closer to San Jose... what a shame you were a bit uncomfortable on that plane..i dont know about the seats.. but i know your very tall... i don´t think you would find most planes comfortable....... i hope you have time to go for a drink sometime soon when you come to baja.... i haven´t heard from you in a while... .. Saludos..
Olga